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Thinking Aloud
Thinking Aloud
Confidence
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Earlier today, a friend told me something about a guy who wanted to get to know her better. The guy apparently introduced himself by giving her a friend request on Friendster and when she asked him who he was, he said that they were in the same section at the review center. My friend, the type who wants to keep things formal, encouraged him to try to talk to her in person so they could have a decent conversation and the guy dismissed her suggestion by saying that he’s usually shy in person. He decided to give her his mobile number instead.

When I heard this, I was a bit enraged. Why do most guys think that they can avoid dealing with “first-meeting awkward situations” by sending virtual messages? I don’t know about most girls, but I think the mere fact that a guy has mustered enough courage to gather his balls and approach a girl, no matter how shy he is, shows a lot about his sincerity in meeting her. Why should you feel shy if you have nothing but the purest or the most platonic of intentions?

Yesterday, I just read an article about how the internet is transforming the youth into a “dumb generation”. According to the author, more young people lack social skills, and the internet has managed to turn them into a bunch of narcissists. I do disagree with that man’s findings but to some extent, I think he made a point. The onset of text messaging and social networking sites like Friendster and MySpace, while giving people a venue for free expression or a platform to the world, obviously has varied effects. And some of them aren't so good.

I was carrying these thoughts in my head on my way home. Suddenly, my friend texted me that maybe we were just overanalyzing things. I figured that it would indeed be pointless to think about something that was so unimportant. So there, case closed. “Okay, maybe he's really shy.” Whatever.

A few minutes later, I boarded a jeepney. It was already close to being full so I had no choice but to sit beside the driver and his companion. Everything was going fine but suddenly, halfway along the trip, the driver’s companion started making small talk.

“Ay, akala ko bababa ka na.” (I thought you were about to get off.)

“Te, inaantok ka yata. Bakit naman?” (You seem sleepy. Why?)

“Te, ‘san ka ba nag-aaral?” (Where are you studying?)

“San ka ba bababa?” (Where are you gonna get off?)

I really wanted to be nice but the smirk on his face told me that if I tried answering his questions, or if I came up with a bunch of sarcastic comebacks, it would have done nothing but please him. He kept on smiling and glancing at the driver and then back at me. Clearly, this guy wanted to irritate me.

I managed to get off the jeepney unscathed, but not without the memory of that horrid guy saying “goodbye” to me in the lousiest of tones. I took a deep breath, and just strangled him in my thoughts.

I then recalled the lack of confidence of the guy who wanted to meet my friend. It’s a little ironic. Earlier, I just wished men were more confident, and after that jeepney ride, I kind of wished they weren’t.

It would of course be pointless to compare the two. One was educated, a college graduate to be exact, and the other was probably wasn't. But hey, confidence and sincerity aren’t taught in school.

I wonder who could be better off?

July 15, 2008 | 5:03 AM Comments  2 comments

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faywang Wambui
July 15, 2008 | 7:47 AM

Your two view points had me laughing but I do think if a man wants a lady, he should approach her upfront and state his intentions.Otherwise if he has no courage to face whatever response he gets from the girl, then he isn't worth her time at all.
sandygaspay Sandy Mae
July 24, 2008 | 2:56 AM

Hey thanks for the nice comments. :) Of course, guys should always approach the girls and state their intentions. Works better that way, dont you think? :)
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